God is in the Struggle

Please note: If this is your first time visiting our blog, please click here to hear the premise of Pass It On, Baby! and how it all began.... Pass It On, Baby!

Hi friends! Greetings from the Jersey Shore! Thank you for sharing your thoughts with me regarding the situation I encountered with the family in need. I LOVED the idea of gift cards to fast food restaurants and I appreciate the encouragement and guidance. Let’s just say that I have taken away some important thoughts on the whole situation and who I want and need to be in the future. Thank you for the comments and for the direct emails that you sent. I learn from you….from those in need and from those that give – humility, generosity, kindness  and love. 

So Friday we spent the day driving here…. and whenever my husband and I drive long distances, we seem to have the most in depth conversations. It must be because when you are driving, everything else is stripped away. There are no chores, no appointments to make/ keep, no cooking, cleaning – you name it. There is only time to be with the one you are driving with and talk. Anyhoo,  I was talking to him about the blog and Pass It On, Baby! and some of my worries and concerns with the present and the future. As we were talking, I kept hearing the phrase “God is in the struggle” over and over again. I told my husband about it, but I also told him that up to this point I have made a conscious decision NOT to mention my religion or beliefs in my posts. Is this because I am not a believer? No…it’s not. It’s because I had a fear that if I started sharing my religious background, that people sharing the same belief structure would feel a common bond with me and that those who don’t…wouldn’t. I mean that I worry that only Catholics reach out to Catholic Charities, that Lutherans reach out to Lutheran Social Services….you get the idea. I want people of ANY religious belief or of no belief at all to feel comfortable reaching out to us for help. 

So the voice in my head kept repeating the phrase…..God is in the struggle. Ok, I heard it….now what does that mean? I didn’t know at first….but since I had the better of twelve hours to think it over, (LOL!!!) here is what I came up with.

I hear a lot these days about religion being a crutch, something that people turn to in their moment of need. What if its not so much the crutch, but instead what is left when the unimportant is stripped away?  

There are many of us, myself included, that strive for the material. But, there will come a time for each and every one of us where no amount of material possessions will make a bit of difference. Maybe it’s the sickness of a loved one, difficulty with a spouse, a death, a bout of depression -- but eventually, we all with come across a life moment where it becomes clear as day that the material really means very little. I can pinpoint those reminders in my own life clear as day.

The most recent one came at the same time as the birth of my daughter. I knew I was expecting a little girl and was thrilled about it. Ashlyn was the first girl born on my side of the family since 1981 and the first girl on my husband’s side since the early 70’s. Needless to say – big deal. Our friends were equally excited for us as they had been there for the births of our boys and knew how badly we had wanted this moment. We were incredibly blessed with gifts from friends, neighbors, family, co-workers – you name it. We were on top of the world. We had a gorgeous nursery for her with a chandelier, everything perfectly coordinating. We had everything you could want materially for a baby girl.

The day I was in labor, I was on a heart monitor since I was being induced. I didn’t pay any attention to it, but at some point,  a nurse came in and my husband could immediately sense her concern. It ended up that my heart was going in and out of rhythm. This began the endless parade of doctors, tests, cardiologists, work-ups --  all during my labor. This is a super-long story in itself, but to make it short, I was eventually told that I had heart disease – a condition that I unknowingly had since birth. The stress of labor was stressing my heart. It would be six long weeks before I would find out the true extent of the situation.

I went home to find myself completely overwhelmed with worry. I panicked at times, cried at others and couldn’t seem to get out of my own head. This should have been one of the happiest times in my life and I was struggling with the unknown. All those beautiful clothes, the fun baby stuff, the flowers, fun gifts – they weren’t able to do anything for me. They seemed so insignificant when I was worrying about whether I’d be around to raise these beautiful babies of mine. I would hold my beautiful new daughter when it was just us and whisper all the things I needed her to hear as guidance for the rest of her life…..just in case.  And so what did I do……I prayed. I focused on my spirituality, I drew close to God. And it was the only place that I found peace and comfort and the ability to accept whatever was coming my way. I was struggling, and God was with me in the midst of my struggle. God IS present in the struggle.

It seems funny that what we focus on the pursuit of, could bring us little if any comfort when we truly need it. On the other hand, what has amazed me most with the people we meet who are in need is there unwavering faith and unbending hope. I am not kidding, not pandering when I say that I am inspired and learning from them. I am HUMBLED when I meet someone of such personal resilience and I look at aspects of themselves as some that I would like to make my own. God is in their struggle. When the material is stripped away, it is your spirit that remains.

None of this we are taking with us, none of this will bring us any comfort in our darkest days. So, let it go….

If you find yourself in the struggle – the emotional, the financial, the physical, remember that you don’t walk alone. If you have a belief structure in place, draw it near. If you don’t, examine your soul for what you do believe in. But as you walk that difficult path, remember that God too is in the struggle with you.

If you aren’t in the struggle, you may have been before. If not, you are blessed. But recognize the false lure of the material and see it as just that – false, and let it go. When you donate your own childrens ‘ clothes, you have let it go. You have detached from the material and helped another along the way. Whether you are a believer or not, I think we can all agree that that has to be the markings of a beautiful world.

Oh and about that heart disease, I have it, but I’m ok. I will see my friendly cardiologist for the rest of my life, but they expect that my life will pretty much remain the same for the near future. And really, can any of us ask for more? J

In love and kindness,

Email Elizabeth & Heather